Gods faithfulness in the midst of pain and heartache, faithfulness that includes Gods listening to our pain and lament.
Those rare moments when I can clear my head and be present.
Those who have the personality gifts I don’t fully express, and who model and encourage positive growth in those gifts. I am blessed to be around people this week who express other gifts and talents that help our organization and also my own personal learning.
The opportunity to have attended Pepperdine university.
Those who take care of Bailey when I’m gone, like Liz and Stephen and Dawn. He loves them!
Being able to dress down from a suit at work. This makes me so happy!
The best friends that I have- Stephen, Michael, Cambry, Adam, Jon, Lindsay, Lavender, Ryan, Dan, Steve…I am blessed.
The stunning views of the Serra Retreat Center! (pictured)
Ryan having a fantastic time with my parents while I “work” in Malibu. I am so grateful that he is so comfortable with my parents.
The book “Grounded” which I’ve been reading this last 3 months (I’m a slow reader and single parent…time is not on my side). I have been quite challenged by its concern for spiritual grounding in this physical world.
The Santa Ana winds that roared yesterday morning. I was reminded all day long of the power and mystery of wind. It might have meant no power for some time but it also meant that I was more focused on the people around than the tech yesterday afternoon.
My conversation with Ryan C yesterday about my spirituality around water and the ocean.
A retreat. It’s not easy to find time so it is so welcomed.
The gathering of Denham, Goldy, and Moore family yesterday afternoon that brought me so much joy and love for the good people that make up my family.
The precious relationships Ryan was forming with my aunts and uncles in the way they played together. Ryan seemed at home here not just with his Grandpa and Grandpa, but among my aunts and uncles. His smile belonged among them!
A great girlfriend, Liz, who really respects and cares for me and for Ryan. She listens to me with intention and respects my idiosyncrasies.
The beautiful California weather yesterday that included the sun peeking through and a perfect temperature.
Feasts with family.
Being a part of a leadership with people who are not just colleagues, but best friends.
The luck and safety of my family through the years with driving. We are fortunate to have never been in major accidents or lost cars in any collisions. That’s no easy task given the sheer amount of driving my family, my extended family, and me, have done in Los Angeles and Houston.
My playtime with Ryan yesterday. It was focused and pleasant, just perfect!
The joy and contentment of waking up at home in SoCal in my parents house and seeing my parents as I come down the stairs.
Ryan’s readiness to play at my parents house. (Pictured)
The beautifully calm flight from Houston last night, which allowed Ryan to be amazed at flying and sleep well.
The “whoa” Ryan uttered last night as our plane ascended and looked over Houston. He loves flying too!
The immediate access I get on my phone that I often take for granted. Last night I had quick access to flight info, boarding passes, internet for bizarre questions, and texts to family and friends to let them know I had arrived. That access, even if slow at times, is quick and made things quite easy.
Southwest Airlines. My favorite airline to fly because I have always received great customer service and they have always been so nice to Ryan.
Having parents who are nurturing and protective and full of compassion.
My SoCal family who I get more than excited to see every time I come home.
Stephen and Liz for stepping up to help me get us to the airport and back.
The mother at the hospital yesterday who held the paradox of being realistic and hopeful in a way that reflected sacred parental love. She came across as so gentle, committed, and open, but also so focused on seeing meaning and purpose in her care of her daughter. She blessed me in our conversation.
Ryan’s many sleep positions!! (pictured)
The flexibility that comes with having enough resources. Contentment goes a long way towards adjusting to changes.
Lemon tea with honey in the morning.
Those times when I can focus on the present moment or even spend sustained time focused on the moments at hand.
The anticipation of Ryan and I’s trip to California. This trip is a chance to reconnect with my PCN friends, but also for Ryan and I to have some quality time with my family. This is going to be enormously awesome for Ryan!
The ocean view drive on Pacific Coast Highway that I get enjoy some this next week on the way to the retreat center.
Victoria S, a PICU nurse who was a good listener for me yesterday.
Our ancillary staff in PICU and the great humor we share together. It is so sustaining to share laughter with great coworkers.
Getting some longer sleep last night
Having a popcorn and show night with Ryan last night. It was cute!
Random check in texts from friends.
The few tiny flowers that have popped up around the complex. One was seemingly alone in the midst of a bush and had a cup like appearance. It was a small thing but I appreciated it’s tiny little beauty.
Ms Clementine, Ryan’s morning teacher who always welcomes him and does a great job of respecting him as a child and student, not just as a toddler.
Ms Cynthia, his afternoon teacher who is really gentle and playful with Ryan, and she goes out of her way to appreciate Ryan when we are leaving. Much love to both her and Clementine as Ryan’s guides during pre K!
The beautiful shapes of clouds.
Ryan’s gentle nature.
Feeling proud of myself for facing this year in all of its fullness.
The constant kindness and love of my parents, who have been a steadying presence all year.
Getting better at not pushing Ryan to do more than he wants when we are lounging at home. I always want to go out and do different activities and experiences, but Ryan is more of a home body and needs both a less full schedule and good playtime with me at home. I’m relieved I am improving in doing both of those.
Sherry Lucas, and her welcoming presence with Liz at church.
Playoff baseball, which always draws my attention.
Trampoline parks and Ryan’s joy there! We had such a great time last night and it’s just so cool to have places with these cool trampolines and foam pits.
Carrying a sleeping Ryan to bed. Few times mean so much as when my son sleeps on my shoulder, tired and content from his day.
That feeling of being exhausted just before sleeping. I find it very calming to know that my body will welcome sleep.
Having yearly passes to the zoo and all the flexibility it gives us for playtime!
Watching Clayton Kershaw pitch and pitch well. It’s like watching Lebron or Gretzky or Griffey Jr or Manning or Brady. I got to see him in his prime!
Komodo dragons, which mesmerized Ryan at the zoo today.
Josh Day. This is hard. As a friend who came and decided to leave my life, I find myself still grateful for the time we had. Lots of joy, lots of great disc golf and Dynamo games, and lots of good conversation from someone who was there during some very devastating losses at the hospital. I miss him, and that tells me I am grateful for him.